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In my “About Me” page of this blog, I stated I am a fire chief’s wife. I should begin by saying that when my husband decided to begin his career in the fire service, I was completely on board. Thus began his career in Rhode Island.

He was a college graduate with Business Administration as his major, and a concentration in finance. He had been a volunteer in our home town and after taking several other jobs after college graduation, decided to take the fire test that was being given in the second largest city in our state. The fire service was his passion and inevitably became mine, as well.

As the wife of this firefighter, I soon realized that this career is not only his but his entire family’s. As his bride it was easier. Nights alone were filled with outings including family and friends; however, once children came into our lives, the evenings alone were far from exciting! Infant, toddler, elementary or even teenage children can be difficult to raise on your own and the life of a firefighter’s wife sometimes feels like you are solo.

Let’s face it, we wives and significant others are on our own plenty as our communities are being secured and cared for by these men/women who decide to engage in firefighting. I attended many family functions without my husband because he was on shift. He missed many of our children’s school affairs and other meaningful events, but our sacrifices were met with much success.

As a young father of two, he became a lieutenant and moved quickly towards his next goal. After studying and ranking at the top of the list he became captain of the Special Hazards truck, but did not stop there. During these years, he was exiting our home for two weeks at a time. He had to go to Maryland to the fire academy where he took courses on how to succeed at becoming an Executive Fire Officer. As he was educating himself he had successfully become a battalion chief, and eventually on to a chief’s position in the northern part of our stomping ground.

For four years he left our home and family to attend this academy and at times it was brutal but I always knew he would be successful. Not only did he attend this course, but upon returning he had an enormous research project due within six months.

When I married this man I knew what he did for a living, but more than that, I knew that the fire service was just that….service! Together we decided that his career wasn’t just an ordinary profession. It was an appointment that we both took very seriously. We had become part of a brotherhood/sisterhood like no other. Another family to love with all the good, bad, happy, sad, trials and tribulations that a family has to endure. Not only do these men and women become reliant on each other during their shifts, but the families become reliant on each other, as well.

I have surmised that “significant others” can either make or break this career choice. We can either be all in with every side of this important service or we can complain about every last minute shift change, overtime, engagements missed and a whole laundry list of other issues. I choose to be all in, and it was a wonderful choice for our family.

I realize this type of career is not always easy to deal with. The fear of something happening to your loved one is always in the back of your mind whenever they leave for their shift. For me I put my faith in my firefighter that he would not put himself into harms way for our sake and the sake of our children. My husband is a very intelligent individual, and I always felt that intelligence would bring him home.

As his wife, I knew there were risks with this hazardous calling not only physically, but mentally as well. The fire service is one of both great satisfaction and joy but its emotional, sometimes devastating effects can linger well after the summons to duty is finished. I decided to be there for him whenever he wanted to discuss specific details, and to not press him for information he was not willing to share. I also tried to be as understanding as I could with the ever changing schedule and outside commitments this appointment brought with it.

My husband followed his heart and found an occupation for which he was deeply passionate. He is now a Chief in Colorado but has served several communities for over 40 years. It was easy for me to back this endeavor because I realized that if he was fervent about his endeavor then in turn I would be content. I always felt that if we are fortunate enough to love our j-o-b, then we truly won’t be working.

Finally, as a firefighter’s wife my support is very critical because this employment choice is not for the faint of heart! Wives, girlfriends, significant others, please remember…you are their anchors.

A Chief’s Wife,

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